Radiohead sung in the early-’90s about how “Anyone Can Play Guitar”. Let me tell you though from firsthand experience that not everyone can do air guitar. It takes a certain type of steely-nerved hero to get up in front of a crowd people and try to entertain them without anything in their hands. Kooky costumes and gimmicks can help, but the spirit of being an air guitar god is something I truly believe you’re born with.
That’s why I can appreciate how after a 12-year absence, seemingly mild-mannered Tim Evans is returning to the Canadian Air Guitar Championships for some unfinished business. Or as he is better known if you’ve ever been lucky enough to see him in action, Glen Airy Glen Rocks!
Qualifiers from across the country will congregate at Toronto’s Mod Club on June 13th to give it their “air” for a shot at the world title in Oulu, Finland, Last year, Canadian representative Dana-Saurus Rex finished THIRD, with the 2019 to-do promising to be an even wilder and woolier affair. If nothing else, look out for the guy in jorts. Evans’ shirt-and-tie persona is bound to class the joint up, but he also passed on to me like the noble air guitar sage he is that creating a memorable and engaging performance is key. Competitors have only one minute to make a splash; editing song selections down to fit the essence of one’s personal mock rock vision isn’t just the hallmark of a true champion, it’s a goshdarned art form.
Air guitar contests are unique in that last-minute, “Brave Soul” participants are allowed, encouraged, and have just as good a chance at glory if you have the right amount of moxie…and maybe a little liquid courage given admittance to the Canadian Championships is 19+. While he’s keeping what the Businessman of Rock will be jamming out to on July 13th close to his suit vest, “Glen” did share a list of kick-ass tracks that have garnered the most success from an air guitar perspective.
Angus, the Crüe, Page, Eddie, even some symphonic prog metal – You can’t go wrong with any of these face-melters in my humble ROCKthusiastic opinion. Don’t agree with the 2007 domestic winner? For one thing, shame on you that’s a living legend you’re disrespecting. Second, if you think YOU can do better like I foolishly did five years ago, step up to the (pretend) mic and come out Saturday night. It’s not like you’ll be going to Roxodus, although if you use “ROXODUS” as a promo code you’ll get a discount off online tickets! I personally guarantee the worst that’ll happen is you’ll have a fun time combined with hearing some great rock, one minute at a time at least.
Giving Air Guitar the Business
(AKA Glen Airy Glen Rocks’ Most Witnessed Air Guitar Tracks)
AC/DC – You Shook Me All Night Long
No Doubt – Just a Girl
Jet – Are You Gonna Be My Girl
Beastie Boys – (You Gotta) Fight for Your Right (To Party!)
Led Zeppelin – Black Dog
The Darkness – Get Your Hands off My Woman
Sex Pistols – God Save the Queen
Heart – Crazy on You
Mötley Crüe – Kickstart My Heart
Van Halen – Eruption
DragonForce – Through the Fire and Flames